The Drug-Free Birth of Cadence - VERY LONG

This is my birth story for Cadence.

After fertility problems before conceiving our first daughter, Emilie, my husband Paul and I were delighted to find out that we were expecting our second child on the first try! (It was the second month of trying to conceive, but we had missed the ovulation boat the first month due to Paul being away at work).

I had experienced morning sickness much worse than with Emilie, which made me think I could be carrying a boy this time. Paul and I were hopeful. We thought having a little boy would be lovely, but of course we just wanted a healthy baby. We both decided we would find out the sex of the baby at the 19 week scan. The morning of the scan, Paul and Emilie were lying in bed together while I got dressed and I asked Paul, “would you be disappointed if we were having another girl?” Paul leaned over and kissed Emilie on the head and said, “no way!” Secretly I was hoping for another little princess! I already knew I wanted to name her Cadence!

The scan revealed that we were expecting another daughter! We were both so excited!

A few days later, Paul and I were doing some work renovating our home and I started getting period-like cramps. I didn’t think much of them until they started getting really painful and I got breathless so I decided to time them and they were around 15 minutes apart. This really scared me, so Paul took me to the hospital where they monitored me and gave me an ultrasound which showed that I wasn’t dilating or effacing. At my next obstetrician appointment my doctor said I had irritable uterus and he would send me for extra scans to make sure I wasn’t at risk of premature delivery.

The period cramps stopped after a while once I began to rest up but I was still having lots of Braxton Hicks Contractions pretty much the whole pregnancy (very inconvenient and uncomfortable, but after a while they just became the norm for me and I got on with things).

At the next scan, it showed that my cervix was still long and closed which was terrific news. But since this was an internal scan it picked up something that the 19 week scan missed – I had placenta previa. I was a bit upset because I was convinced I would have to have a Caesarian Section instead of a natural birth. However at the 36 week scan it showed that even though the placenta was still low-lying, it was far enough away from the cervix for a vaginal birth!

Another issue that I was worried about was the fact that when Emilie was born at 37 weeks, her placenta had aged prematurely – it was calicified – and it was at the same condition as what a 42 week placenta would have been. (No, I’m not a smoker! It was just one of those things!)

So as I was nearing 37 weeks I was watching for every little sign that something could have gone wrong with my baby. Even though my 36 week scan showed that the placenta looked quite healthy.

At 37+4 weeks I noticed that I hadn’t felt the baby move for most of the day, and the movements I did feel were very weak. At 37+5 weeks I still hadn’t felt her move much so I called the birth hospital. They advised to come in for a CTG to monitor the baby’s heart rate and count kicks. The CTG showed that baby’s heart rate was normal, even though she wasn’t moving much.

At my obstetrician appointment the next day, my doctor discussed this with me and said that it sometimes babies can go very quiet just before they are born, but considering the history with Emilie’s placenta I needed to keep a close eye on things. He talked about induction on Wednesday, but I said my husband was working away until the following Tuesday and I would prefer to keep growing the baby unless things took a turn for the worst. He said that was fine but wanted me to have a CTG every second day until birth and to count kicks religiously.

That night, before I went to bed I prayed over my baby and asked God to protect her and to have her delivered safely and soundly into my arms. I prayed that if this was the proper time for her to be born then let it happen before my doctor says I needed to be induced. I talked to Paul on the phone and let him know that he may have to organise a flight home and to talk to his boss the next day.

At midnight I woke with a period-like cramp that went away after a bit. I thought, “hmm I wonder if this is the start of something?” and went back to sleep. I woke again just after 1am with another cramp, and fell asleep again. Again I woke after 2am and again after 3am. Once I woke at 3am I couldn’t get back to sleep. (I didn’t know at the time, but Paul later told me that he had woken at 3am and hadn’t been able to sleep either!) I had another contraction just after 4am and I had two more contractions in the space of an hour.

At 5:30am I couldn’t wait any longer and I messaged Paul. “Sorry to disturb you so early, just wanted to tell you that I’ve been having contractions all night average of one per hour, they don’t last long, only about 10-15 seconds but painful/intense enough to wake me up. The last two were half an hour apart. I’m thinking of asking them to examine me to see if I’m dilating when I go in this morning and do you think I should officially time them or not worry about it just yet?”

Paul texted back saying “Start timing them and discuss it with the doc and let me know ASAP xxx”

So I dropped Emilie off at my Auntie Susan’s house and went to the hospital for the CTG. The contractions were coming around every half hour. When I got to the hospital I went in to the examination room where I was hooked up.

Paul called me as the midwife was hooking me up and told me he was getting on a plane now. I said “ok, call me and I’ll let you know whether I can come to pick you up or not”.

I told the young midwife that was monitoring me that I had been having contractions and could I have an internal exam to see if I was dilating? She said, “well nothing is showing up on the trace, and if I give you an internal it just increases the risk of infection. You can be 2 to 2.5 cm dilated for weeks before birth so it wouldn’t really give us any clue as to what is happening”.

So after the CTG (which showed baby’s heart rate was still fine) I walked out to the car and as I got to the car I had another contraction!! Typical!

I drove back to Susan’s house to pick up Emilie and ended up staying there waiting for Paul to call. I was sitting on Susan’s couch and as I had a contraction Susan said “I can see you are having a contraction right now!” We decided to time the contractions and they were ranging from 8 minutes to 20 minutes apart.

Paul called me at around lunch time and I went to pick him up. By the time I got to the airport the contractions were around 10-15 minutes apart and becoming more painful.

That afternoon I was still having them but they weren’t really very regular and if I sat or lay down they stopped. I decided to have an afternoon sleep while Emilie had her nap. When we woke up the contractions had stopped. I was so disappointed, so I sat on my birth ball and with my breast pump I did about 20 minutes of stimulation which made me have really intense Braxton Hicks every 5 minutes. I stood up to go to the toilet and I had a massive contraction where I could actually feel the pressure pushing the baby down!

When I went to the toilet there was a mucous plug on my pad (I had been losing it for about a week or two) and it was tinged with blood.

We decided to go for a walk to see if it would make things progress. We walked (I waddled) around the block and the contractions were really close together so I had to keep stopping when I had one. Just before we got back home they were around 2 minutes apart but still only lasting about 20 seconds each and not that painful, just intense. Once we got home at around 4pm I had two contractions in the space of 20 minutes and then NOTHING! I was really tired from trying to make them come on that I gave up and just chilled for the rest of the night.

That night before going to bed I prayed again and I had a feeling that said, “you need this break to get some rest – you are going to need it for tomorrow” so I went to bed early and had a really good night’s sleep.

The next morning I woke and I was having only mild period-pain contractions around every 20 minutes and regular. I hadn’t felt the baby move. I texted my obstetrician and asked told him the situation and he called me back and told me he was at the hospital and he could examine me and break my waters if that’s what we wanted? I said Paul and I had discussed it and would like to have my waters broken. He said there was room for me to come in.

So I told Paul, “Let’s get my bags and we’ll call Susan to meet us at the hospital”. Paul said, “ok, I’m just going to go to the shops and get some milk”. I said, “WHAT?! No, the doctor wants us there now!” But he insisted we needed milk, so he dressed Emilie and off they went to the shops! I grabbed my hospital bags and Emilie’s bags and went to put them in the car but he had taken the keys with him!!! I was getting really anxious! I had to tell myself to calm down.

I called Susan and asked her to meet us at the hospital. I called my mum and she said she would drive up from Mount Barker (which is around 4 hours from Perth). I also called my other birth partner, my sister, Alyssa. After what seemed like forever, Paul came back and we headed off. Susan met us at the hospital shortly after we arrived. I said goodbye to Emilie and gave her a kiss and cuddle and they went. Paul decided to go and have something to eat. He said he wouldn’t be long…

Then I was hooked up to a CTG. I was having weak and irregular contractions about 5-10 minutes apart that reached about 70-80 on the toco. The baby’s heart rate was ok – around 140-145bpm but she wasn’t moving and there was no fluctuation of the heart rate.

My obstetrician came in and said “oh, are you on your own?” I said, “no, my husband got flown home yesterday but he’s gone to have lunch!” Doc said, “Would you like me to wait for him?” I said, “no!”

So at 12 noon, the doctor did an internal – I was already 4cm dilated (established labour) and 75% effaced! The midwife Sonya held my hand as the doctor ruptured the membranes. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be! Only seconds later I had my strongest contraction yet – it reached about 120 on the toco and I knew this would get things moving along! The doctor said he would come back in a few minutes to hook me up to the syntocin drip but I asked if he would give my body a chance to progress on its own now that my membranes had been ruptured. He said he would give me until 3pm to progress on my own and then if I hadn't progressed he would have to put me on the drip.

The doctor instructed Sonya to check the baby’s heart for ten minutes every hour and left. I was hooked back up to the CTG to see how the baby was faring after the breaking of waters. The baby was still not moving but her heart rate was still fine. The contractions were coming on a bit more intense now and around 5 minutes apart. Paul finally came back from lunch. He had called my mum and she had said that she had more things to pack (even though she told me the night before that she was ready to jump in the car whenever I called her) and she would be leaving Mt Barker at 2pm at the earliest.

Then about 15 minutes later baby woke up a bit and Sonya was happy to disconnect me from the CTG and I was free to walk around.

I asked for a birth ball and I bounced on that for a bit. But I found that the contractions would come more regularly if I was walking around the room. They slowed if I was on the ball. Sonya said to do a combination of both since walking promotes the contractions but bouncing on the ball opens the pelvis and helps the baby come further down.

There was a shift change and who should come in but the midwife from yesterday! Her name is Georgie. I said, “I told you I was having contractions!” She said, “Hello! I can’t believe you were already 4cm dilated!” I laughed and said, “Yes, and you didn’t believe me yesterday!!!” We had a good chuckle.

Just after 1pm I was hooked back up to the CTG lying down and the contractions stopped completely. Baby was happy, heart rate was fine. The contractions started back up when I got back up off the bed. So I continued to walk around, the pain was bearable but getting more intense. They were 5 minutes apart and lasting around a minute each.

An hour after the last CTG I was hooked up again but this time I asked to stand while hooked up. This time the contractions were definitely showing on the trace and I had a few that I had to breathe through. They were different to the contractions I felt when in labour with Emilie. These ones had more of a bite to them with a very sharp pain at the peak.

Baby was still happy and Paul and I decided to go for a walk around the labour ward. Alyssa texted me and asked if she should come to the hospital yet (she was in the middle of a court trial and couldn’t get away). I said the contractions were still bearable and I was still ok.

Paul and I did three laps of the labour ward and the pain was getting worse so I headed back to my room. Contractions were now around 2-4 minutes apart and lasting around a minute each. They peaked very quickly and came down slowly.

Then I asked if I could get in the shower. So Georgie got the temperature ready for me and Paul joined me in the shower. I sat on the commode and Paul put the shower head directly on my lower belly and it made the contractions so much easier to bear. But sitting down made the contractions stop again. 3pm was getting nearer and I was really willing my body to keep the contractions coming so I didn’t have to go on the drip. So if I hadn’t felt a contraction for 5 minutes I stood up from the commode which immediately brought one on.

Sonya wanted to check the baby’s heartrate with the Doppler and we decided to check progress at the same time, so after a contraction we hurried to the bed where I was checked and I was 6cm and completely effaced, so all I needed to do now was dilate. I got back into the shower after another contraction.

I was starting to feel like I was losing energy so I asked for one of the icypoles I had brought. Georgie brought me a raspberry flavour one and it was so good! It was while I was eating the icypole that I realised the contractions were coming even when I was sitting down! I asked what the time was and I was told 2:50pm and they were about to call my obstetrician and let him know I was progressing great and didn’t need the drip! Yay! By this stage I was unable to sit on the commode during a contraction, I had to hold onto the bars at the side of the shower while Paul held the shower head on my belly and I lifted myself off the commode to alleviate the pressure I felt during the contraction.

Some of the visualisations that worked at this stage for me were:
-Thinking of the train in Dumbo that goes “I think I can, I think I can, I. THINK. I. CAN. I…. thought I could I thought I could” LOL
- Picturing Emilie’s face smiling at me and remembering her as a newborn.
-Riding on a rainbow rollercoaster going up, up, up, then down the other side

Corny I know but it worked for a while!

Georgie asked if I would like to try the bath and I agreed, so she went and ran the bath. When it was ready we waited for one contraction to finish and then we raced across the hall with a towel crudely draped over me! I got into the bath and it was lovely… until a contraction came on and I immediately wished I was back in the shower. It was awful! It was the first contraction that I panicked with and felt out of control and I was writhing around in the bath screaming “NO, NO, NO, NO”

Sonya and Georgie tried to massage my lower back but I hated it. I didn’t want anyone to touch me. I am a bit fuzzy from this point onwards so I can’t really remember but I was later told that I was saying things like, “pleeeeeease give me an epidural” and “I don’t want to do this anymore, let’s go home so I can have a sleep” and according to Paul I swore only the once.

I told the midwives I wanted to get back in the shower so after one contraction I quickly got out and raced back across the hall with my towel, back to my room and straight back into the shower. But I wasn’t in there for long until I started feeling the urge to push. I said “it can’t be, it can’t be, it’s too soon…” and Sonya said, “why can’t it be?” so she said she would check me again. I got back up on the bed again and I was 9cm! Oh how I wished I was 10cm!!!

I said, “oh no, how much longer have I got to go?” and she said only a few more contractions and I’ll be there. I wanted to get on all fours so they helped me to turn around on the bed and I held onto the bar at the top of the bed and pulled down on it when a contraction came. I was coping by moaning “no, no, no, no, no, no, yes, yes, yes” over and over. (“No” when the contraction was climbing and “yes” when it was coming down).

Only a short time later I got the unbearable feeling to push and I told Sonya. I pushed while I was pulling down on the bar (I was supposed to resist the urge to push until the baby’s head was all the way down due to haemorrhoids but I couldn’t help it, I told Sonya “I DON’T CARE ABOUT THE HEMORROIDS I JUST WANT TO PUUUUUUSH!!!”)

I was getting nowhere in that position and it was complete agony. I was tiring really quickly and my legs were like jelly. Paul was fanning me with a wet flannel and in between one contraction to the next he swapped sides of the bed and I yelled at him to keep fanning me. He said, “well my arm was getting tired bending all the way over the bed” and I said “BOO FRIGGIN HOO!” and the midwives giggled so I told them to shut up it wasn’t funny.

I panicked during another contraction because I couldn’t find the right position to push in so I finally said I wanted to lay on my back to push and the midwives readily agreed since when I was bearing down I was squatting so low to the bed they couldn’t see whether the baby was coming down. I knew the baby wasn’t coming down at all and I could actually feel her sucking back up after each contraction.

Once I was on my back things went a lot better. I could anchor my feet to the bed with my knees bent while Paul held my right leg and Georgie held my left leg. They both held my hands so I could put my chin to my chest and push. The first few contractions I was yelling/grunting as I pushed and an older midwife who had come in for the delivery kept telling me to stop making noises and use the energy to push. In between one contraction I remember looking up into Paul’s eyes and he was encouraging me and it gave me the strength to keep going. Once I got into the rhythm of it and used my energy to push and not yell I could feel her starting to crown, but I lost steam half way during the contraction and she sucked back up. The old midwife stretched my perineum and told me to stop because my old episiotomy scar was too thick and was going to have a nasty tear, so she quickly gave me some anaesthetic and did the episiotomy.

The next contraction I felt her crowning again and I yelled “MY VAGINA HURTS!” and the old midwife told me to keep pushing, another one, another one, and after what felt like a million pushes her head was birthed and everyone “AWWWWed” Well done, they all said and I reached down and touched her head. It was slimy and I could feel the little hairs. I couldn’t feel her face because she was obviously facing my tailbone but just the feel of her head gave me the drive to give birth to her!

Next contraction I really used every ounce of strength to push, push, push and finally she was born at 5:06pm and put straight onto my chest! She pooed as she came out so there was meconium and blood and vernix everywhere but she was here! When the cord had stopped pulsating, Paul cut her cord.

While I was recovering and gazing upon my beautiful newborn Sonya was massaging my tummy for a natural third stage but Georgie drew up a shot of syntocin just in case they had to get the placenta out quicker. But ten minutes later I birthed the placenta without the need for any syntocin! So I had a drug free, natural third stage birth – not even gas and air.
Around 15 minutes after Cadence was born, my obstetrician arrived and stitched up my episiotomy. When he was done Alyssa was allowed in (I later realised that she messaged me 2 minutes after Cadence was born saying “I’m here” LOL) and Georgie helped Cadence to attach to my nipple for the first feed. It took a while to get her going but she eventually latched and fed. When she was done she was weighed and measured – 3440g (7lb9oz), Length 48cm and Head Circumference 34.5cm.

She was wiped, swaddled and had some cuddles with daddy. Then Alyssa had some cuddles while Paul helped me have a shower.

I’m so proud of myself for going drug-free. Although it’s what I wanted to do I totally doubted that I could do it, but I’m so surprised that I actually made it!

If you made it to the end of my story, thanks for reading!